How many thoughts do we have that go through our heads every single day? According to research, it’s estimated that we have over 6000 thoughts daily. And how many of those thoughts are negative? How many of them are actually pulling us down? Here’s where it gets interesting: Up to 90% of our thoughts are subconscious, meaning we don’t even realize that we’re playing that same negative tape over and over in our minds!
So how can we turn negative subconscious thoughts into something more positive? Here are 3 simple steps to help with that process.
- Acknowledge Your Negative Thoughts
We all have negative thoughts; this is something no one can avoid. The problems come when we try to ignore and brush them under the surface. What you resist persists. Doing this only amplifies such thoughts, making them worse in the process. The solution? Acknowledge your negative thoughts. Own them; allow them to pass through you—you must feel them to heal them. Some of the advantages of acknowledging your negative thoughts include:
- Learning what your triggers are
- How to process difficult feelings in a healthy and productive manner
- More self-awareness
- Deeper connection with yourself
- Healing the wounded parts that you may be ignoring
Becoming comfortable with your negative thoughts allows you to be present with and feel your emotions. This process helps you to manage such feelings better and deal with them more effectively.
- Withhold Judgment
Yes, it’s important to bring our toxic thoughts to the surface. However, we also need to notice and acknowledge those thoughts without judgment. Here’s an important note: Judgement robs us of our happiness and peace of mind. We step into the trap of self-criticism when we constantly pass judgment on our thoughts. This slippery slope is dangerous. Instead, we need to acknowledge our thoughts without condemning them. This process helps us to:
- Become more self-accepting and compassionate
- Prevents us from feeling worse about ourselves
- Helps the negative feelings pass naturally
- Enables us to see and embrace the brighter side of ourselves
- Process Your Thoughts
The most important part of converting negative thoughts to positive ones is to process and work through them. How do we do this? A very effective way to process our thoughts and feelings is to question their origin. This simple process helps us to uncover the often unconscious story we tell ourselves that strengthens our negative self-talk. Here are some good questions you can ask to begin unpackaging your negative thoughts:
- What’s the story behind this thought
- Does this thought have merit? Is it true?
- Is there a better way of thinking about this? If so, what is it?
- How is this situation helping me? How is it makes me better?
- What can I learn from this?
Processing negative thoughts through questioning is critical to converting them into positive ones. This process allows you to shift your perspective and, as a result, your actions going forward.
Another powerful exercise for processing your thoughts is journaling.
They say it takes 21 days to form a new habit; this concept applies to changing your thinking habits. So try journaling your thoughts for 21 days to shift your thinking and convert your negative thoughts into positive ones!
Find Your Tribe at Certified Flourishing Coach
Changing your thoughts and improving your life can be difficult. For this reason, it’s important not to go it alone; we all need each other to thrive and flourish. At Certified Flourishing Coach, we are a community of growth-oriented, people-centred leaders looking to make a difference in the world. If this sounds like you, consider contacting us today to learn more.
About The Author
Connie Jakab has been working in resilience and flourishing for over 20 years. Starting with youth at risk and gangs in East Vancouver, Connie has been researching how community creates resilience and mental wellness her entire career through a sociological lens. Connie is the Director of Community Engagement for the Certified Flourishing Coaching™, and is excited to facilitate our trainings in Calgary, Vancouver and Victoria, B.C.